What does this mean? It means you can influence the way you feel by changing your focus. We’ve all been emotionally moved by a film or movie and have laughed or cried despite knowing that the story isn’t real but we put our attention to the storyline and it touched us. So basically, we observed or think about something and as a result our mind produced an appropriate feeling. It pretty much happens on a subconscious level and there’s nothing wrong with it. But knowing that what we observe or think about, influences how we feel, means we can use this to our advantage. Energy flows where attention goes, so we put your attention to something, and our energy responds accordingly. So if I choose to dwell on a situation that makes me sad or angry, I feel sad or angry and if I choose to change my focus and think about something positive, a happy memory or someone I love, my feelings follow suit. And if I watch the news, quite often I feel bad or worried afterwards but if I choose to watch something heart-warming or funny, I feel better. I also love daydreaming and conjuing up happy memories, that certainly changes how I feel. My top tip today is to pay attention to your thoughts and watch what you watch!
Did you know, that you can create your own anchor of inspiration and positivity by choosing a very uplifting memory and remember it vividly several times a day. We can’t be stressed and happy at the same time. By changing your focus, you change your energy level. Use happy memories to lift you up or daydream about happy future memories. If you need help finding more happiness and balance in your life, please get in touch email@example.com or firstname.lastname@example.org
I hope you’ve found this helpful. Happy daydreaming. Take care. Sandy
Yet another lockdown has been announced and I can almost
hear all the many desperate voices saying “Oh no, not again!” Even though I
expected this announcement, I admit that I noticed an immediate blow to my
mood, a sinking feeling, worries coming up regarding my business, my clients
and loved ones and I just needed a day or so to gather my thoughts and process upcoming
I’ve recently noticed that I’m not my usual happy self and feel a bit out of balance, so now I’m making an extra effort to look after myself, my mental health and emotional balance. Luckily, I’ve got all the knowledge and tools to help myself and others and have, in fact, been teaching them for years. Now, that I’m feeling much better, I thought I’d share a few tips that helped me to get out of the lockdown blues! Perhaps this will help you too! Try my alphabetic ABCDEFGHIJ approach! Here is the short version of my favourite ten tips:
1. Acceptance is the key! Denial, distraction or ignoring
a situation and especially our feelings towards it is not going to help. My
motto is ”accept what you can’t change and change what you can’t accept!”.
So, I can’t change this lockdown but I CAN change how I feel about it. After allowing
myself a bit of time to accept, acknowledge and feel the feeling, I then move
on, tap or dance it away.
2. Deep focused breathing is one of the best
ways to regain calmness and balance. I love 7-11 breathing and heart-centred
breathing. These wonderful exercises certainly help me feel better whenever I’m
not at ease. If you’re not familiar with them, then just take a few minutes and
focus on your breath, perhaps count to five or six with each in- and outbreath and
observe the movement of your body. Most negative feelings put us into fight or
flight, which means we can’t think clearly and might tend to catastrophise. Yet
calm deep breathing takes us out of this cycle, helps us relax and get our positive
brain power back. Do this regularly or whenever you feel anxious, sad or
3. Reach out and connect to others. A sense of connection is an innate basic need that we all have because we are social beings. This is not the time to crawl into a cave and wait until this is all over. You’re not alone and not meant to be. Let us all reach out to one another, talk to our loved ones, set up video calling, a WhatsApp group and share precious moments even if it’s in a socially distant or digital way.
4. Dance all your worries away! Nothing lifts my mood
as much as putting on some of my favourite music and dance around my living
room, normally only when I’m alone. I know it sounds crazy and it might take a
few minutes to get into it but try it and perhaps get the whole family
involved. I have friends who’d make a zoom party out of this.
5. Use EFT tapping! I love using EFT to tap on any negative
feelings and released them. So, I label the feeling, focus on where it sits in
my body, I measure its intensity on a scale from 1-10 to get clarity and then I
say out loud “Even though this situation makes me feel …., I accept how
I feel right now” and I tap through the points until I feel better.
6. Have some fun! I know it’s hard when you’re feeling a bit down but think of the things you enjoyed as a child. Be creative, use your imagination! It could be as simple as dressing up as someone else, find your old skipping rope, make a collage, watch your favourite film, eat your favourite food, bake a cake, write a story, dye your hair, repot your plants, dance in your living room…. The list is endless!
7. Focus on gratitude and count your blessings! If
you get caught up in negative thinking, just say “stop!” Thoughts can spiral
but we have the power to intervene. We can choose our thoughts consciously. By
counting your blessings or naming at least five things you’re grateful for, you
can shift your thinking from negative to positive. Start a gratitude list and
add more items every day, put it on your fridge or above your desk and read it
often to remind yourself of all the good things in your life.
8. Have a hug! The lack of human touch can have such
a negative impact on our mental health. I know we need to accept the social
distancing rules but if you have people in your household or social bubble, make
sure you hug them and receive one in return, provided it feels safe! If it doesn’t
hug yourself, hug a cushion or a teddy bear and close your eyes while imagining
it’s a loved one or offer to take a neighbours dog out for a walk and pet the
dog and play with him.
9. Use your imagination! Our minds are more powerful than we know. We can conjure up positive and negative images which then affect our mood. So why not use the lockdown to engage in some daydreaming or imagine a few wonderful scenarios that will make you happy. The aim is to feel good!
10. Do more of what brings you joy. This is in line with number six above. We can’t change the past, we don’t know what the future will bring, we just have this moment right now, so why not conjure up a few moments of joy, even if it’s just sharing your favourite anecdotes or jokes with someone or your diary.
Just to let you know, I’m at your service and love to help and inspire others. I’m available for online sessions and have a number of online products available. Feel free to get in touch.
The lovely autumn season has arrived, and we can witness how wonderful change can be and how easy it is to let go. I love going for walks in autumn, reflect on things, ponder on what changes to embrace in my own life and if there’s anything I need to let go.
The change of seasons is a great time to make changes, it almost feels natural, like working hand in hand with nature. Getting ready to put old unhelpful thought patterns and habits to sleep. I guess this is also what this month’s Stoptober is about, don’t you think?
Well, if you’re ready to make a change or let go of something, here’s a very special one-time only offer for you. Get a whopping £20 discount on your next 1-2-1 session and only pay £50 instead of £70. Valid for any 1-2-1 session with me booked before 31st October. Book now as I have limited availability. I do sessions online (Skype or Zoom) as well as face-to-face in Brighton and Eastbourne.
Finally a word on fear. These are difficult times for a lot of people. Feeling afraid and restricted almost seems to have become the new normal of 2020. Yet know that we can’t be afraid and happy at the same time. If you’re afraid you’re making yourself more vulnerable as fear has a detrimental effect on our immune system. So please take regular breaks from the news and negativity around and make it your mission to do something nice instead, either for yourself or somebody else. Look after your emotional needs, watch something funny, talk to a beloved friend or family member, do a breathing or tapping exercise and count your blessings. There’s always something to be grateful for. Being relaxed and grateful is much better for your health as being afraid. So be cautious, of course, but take time to laugh and play. You have choice! Give every day the chance to be the best of your life!
Happy Halloween, if you celebrate it. Take care. Love, light and angel blessings. Sandy
According to the NHS and the British Pain Society, almost half (43%) of the population in the UK suffer from chronic pain, that’s about 28 million people! This year (2020) is likely to see a rise in numbers, due to changes in circumstances since Covid, like working from home, self-isolating, lack of exercise and reduction in pain service provision.
Having suffered from chronic pain myself for several years in the past, this topic is important and personal and one of the reasons I changed profession to become a holistic health practitioner after having found alleviation and healing from my condition. In this article, I’d like to help you understand why we may suffer from chronic pain, what factors influences the pain level and explain how to manage and alleviate it.
Let’s start by trying to understand why we experience pain. Pain is a symptom which the body uses to communicate with us, telling us something is not right. Pain is feedback, similar to the engine light in your car signalling something is wrong. Acute pain should never be ignored and if treated appropriately in most cases, long term pain can be avoided. Yet what if you are already suffering from chronic pain and doctors can’t help?
My view is that chronic pain happens for a reason, often subconscious psychological reasons that we are not aware of, yet if we can find them, deal with them and make a conscious shift, we may find that the pain changes too, becomes more bearable, manageable and even starts healing. The body usually has a natural ability to heal itself. If you cut your finger, you heal the wound, put a plaster on and it heals. If you break a bone and stabilize the body part, the bone grows back together. People recover from accidents, surgery, falls, injuries, etc. So, in my view, if you’re suffering from chronic pain it means, there’s something holding the condition in place, either physical or psychological.
One factor is that, the body can change and adapt. While most of our physical bodies naturally strive for health, they can only heal themselves if they’re given the opportunity to do so. Stress puts the body in fight or flight mode, where the main concern is survival. It’s a natural biological response which we’ve inherited from our ancestors. Therefore, constant stress can prevent the body from healing as it only feels ‘safe enough’ to heal and recuperate when we’re calm and relaxed. To allow the body to heal, watch your stress level!
In addition, sometimes one problem can cause another, such as when someone has sprained their ancle or hurt their knee, they put more weight on the healthy one which might then also start hurting if this continues for long enough. The body will change and adapt to any circumstances, doing the best it can to lower pressure and find balance. So be mindful of how you’re using your body.
Pain is subjective, some people can tolerate more than others. Ever wondered why that is? A number of factors influence how we experience pain: our beliefs play a role, past (pain) experiences, our current stress level or even how we see ourselves. Did you know that your current stress level will influence the degree of pain you feel? Stress triggers a number of physical reactions, such as increased blood flow which means more blood also flows through the painful body part, increasing the sensation of pain. Therefore, another effective way to manage your pain level is to learn to relax. There’s a wide variety of relaxation methods available, so why not try to find one that suits you? I’m happy to give you my FREE guided relaxtion visualisation. It’s a 10 minute audio relaxation to help you feel more balanced https://www.emotionalbalance.co.uk/freebies/
Yet another effective way to manage your pain is to befriend your body and listen to the communication it is offering. As mentioned above pain is feedback. Many see their body as their enemy “Why is my body doing this to me?” Try a new approach, take time to listen, go inside and search for reasons and emotions behind the pain. Once you understand the message, your body might not need to “shout so loud” anymore. Send positive thoughts and mental messages to your body. It’s doing the best it can given the position it is in. Give yourself of painful body part a hug, apply an appropriate lotion, heat or cold pack, breath into the pain and practice acceptance rather than resistance. Resistance fuels stress, acceptance allows healing. Create the best conditions to allow your body and mind to heal.
There’s plenty more to be said about this topic. If you’re suffering from chronic pain and would like to learn more about how to manage it, you’re invited to join my next live 2-hour workshop on 17th October in Brighton! Numbers are limited, so make sure you book your place asap! To find out more:
To book your place, send an email with your name and telephone number to email@example.com
I hope you found this article
informative and helpful. If you know anyone who suffers from chronic pain, feel
free to share it with them. My mission is to help as many people as possible as
I know from personal experience how limiting life with chronic pain can be.
Feelings, especially on the negative spectrum, can be overwhelming, distracting, even numbing. Often, we just don’t have time to deal with them, so we turn to food, drinks, TV, work, etc. Moreover, society has taught us to swallow and smile and pretend everything is ok, but repressing our emotions can lead to further problems. Emotions have energy behind them and they can build up and cause problems later.
For example, we might get to the point when we just can’t take it anymore and explode, which affects the people around us and often leads to tensions and regret. Sometimes even physical problems can manifest as a result of unexpressed emotions. Repressing anything (or anyone) does never work in the long run as it builds up pressure and tension. What would happen to a pressure cooker without a valve to release the steam?
Now, so how can I become more aware of my emotions and learn to release them in a safe way? Well, the first step is to connect to our body, notice how it feels and acknowledge those feelings. Some people like writing down what bothers them, work off anger in the gym or tell a friend about it. Personally, I’m a big fan of breathing techniques, which help to let go of the energy behind the emotion. For instance, focus on a particular feeling (or a person that triggers a negative feeling) and breathe it out (long and slowly), then imagine breathing in (long and slowly) something positive, such as the energy of peace, forgiveness, calmness, etc. Then with the outbreath, let go of the old negative emotion, followed by breathing in the positive. Visualise it, connect to it and focus on it for several minutes. Notice how much better you feel after 5 minutes, not to mention that the additional oxygen helps you think more clearly.
A second very effective technique for deep emotional healing is EFT tapping. EFT is a nice blend of ancient wisdom like traditional Chinese medicine and modern psychology. We tap on certain meridian points which are part of our energy system while focusing on the particular distress and verbalising it, this helps shifting and releasing the energy of it. If you’re new to EFT, perhaps work with a practitioner or join a group.
If you’re out or at work and unable to “escape” to try out these techniques or you’re not ready to face it just yet, then perhaps try a different approach. Find something funny on the internet and laugh it off. Laughter releases tensions and endorphins and is a great quick fix if needed.
Or be mindful and shift your focus to the little things in life that bring us joy and pleasure, such as sunshine, a cup of coffee, a smile, green traffic lights, having friends, a hug, cuddle a pillow, person or pet. Well you get the idea. This is however, just a temporary fix. Sooner or later you might have to face your feelings and let off steam in a safe way. After all, we are all human beings and feelings are part of our deepest humanity.
Have a great day. Love, light and angel blessings. Sandy